I believe Buddha was a great teacher and his advice is to think before opening your mouth and ask yourself these questions about what you are to say: is it true? necessary? kind? What a great piece of advice, however sometimes we need to communicate things which are not so pleasant and this was the topic of my latest Facebook live broadcast. Here are a few thoughts on the matter:
Clear and straight communication is essential but sometimes you need to check if it is your ego telling you to have the last word in an argument or it brings up some old regrets. There are these cases when it is better to silent the ego and let just let it go. But when it comes to stand up for yourself, dare to be yourself and express your thoughts then you simply must speak what is on your mind. Why?
- People DON’T read your mind. Some things may be evident to you since you played that certain conversation a million times in your head but see, the other person did not hear that before. Tell them what bothers you and remember we interpret things differently. Think about Gary Champman’s love languages, how amazing that we express love individually, differently.
- Saying what is on your mind can release stress, at least some part of it. Words that are unsaid may cause a viscious circle in your head and in order to avoid casuing you any further harm, including physical, it is better just to say them out loud.
- Some people take advantage of your silence as they push the boundaries and tend to go far with you and you know why? Because they know they can. Believe me, once you start giving respect to yourself and set your limits, others will do the same and you can ear their respect too.
- Get rid off the „I wish I did” feeling which is a poison to your soul. Saying what you think is better than regretting not to do it later. You owe it to yourself (and in some cases to the other person) to express your genuine feelings and thoughts and put them into words.
- Straight talk improves relationships because deep down we all wish for the truth. The truth that sometimes hurts and we run away form it but we feel that knowing the worse is better than being in doubts. Some of your relationships will become stronger than ever while others you may lose due to your honesty but latter ones would not have any future anyway.
Thank you for checking this post, next week another Facebook live show so stay tuned for the topic and notes!