My latest #livePLUS Facebook Live show was about energy vampires and though my live shows are in Hungarian, I definitely want to share my notes in English too so here are my thoughts on the topic. We all have met them and sometimes they appear in our lives not by our choices but
- they can be some old school friends with whom we have known each other for decades and we feel bad to end the relationship
- they can be attached to someone we love, like our partner’s friend or our mom’s new partner, we did not choose them
- sometimes the context bind us with them: we share the same workplace for instance
How can you spot these toxic people?
- no matter how they come to your life, they have one thing in common: they drain you
- they are jealous and they express it thtough constant criticism as they are sure to be smarter than the rest of us, they are judgemental
- They want us to feel bad and being near them may give headaches, literally
- they don’t respect your opinion
- they only take and rarely give, whether it is time or attention and love
Sometimes it is more challenging to spot them as we are under the influence of our own emotions so here are a few questions to ask yourself:
- Do you feel valued, loved and genuinely supported when you are with that person?
- How would you describe the dynamics of your relationship? What you give and what you get is nearly equal? (time, attention, love, etc)
- Do you dare to be truly yourself with them, without afraid of being mocked, judged or ridiculed?
- If they only drain you, examine the root of your relationship, what does keep you together? Can anything change to the better in your relationship?
- Finally, ask the question and give yourself an honest answer: is there any point to keep the relationship going or not?
Last but not least, what to do when life brings toxic people in your way?
- Take a deep breath and let it go. There is no space and place in your life and heart for such a toxic person.
- Take a few steps back and know that their words and actions are projections of their own frustration and have nothing to do with you.
- Don’t forget the root of your relationship and do not give them more space than needed. And remember, you can walk away anytime!
- Don’t let them crawl under your skin! Protect your own energies with an invisible shield.
- Remind yourself of your values and know your worth, you deserve loving and caring people who genuinely support you!
Next week another exciting topic is coming up for my Facebook live, watch out for my notes in English!